Energy price rises and stabbing people go together suspiciously well

I wasn't paying attention, and the next thing I know, I've been doing this blog for a whole year. So, happy birthday blog. Well done.

Have some cake.

Now if I was clever, I could link this article back to my first thing I did, which was probably me talking about going to the dentist and having her pin my head to the table and command me to floss more. However, considering that quite got the point across, my teeth and gums are things of great health, so much so my dentist barely wants anything to do with me anyone. Pah.

So today, all I have left to talk about is the traditional mix of politics and video games. Because those two topics go together so well!

For starters, I am overcome with mirth over energy prices situation right now. A few weeks ago, we had Ed Miliband get up on stage an announce he intended to challenge the energy prices of this country, including a price freeze.

The response to this was predictable: plenty of people guffawing about how little Eddy knew nothing about the free market and how he was a socialist or communist, depending on the source. That speech also apparently managed to knock a billion pounds off the energy stock marke. So. Whoops. Not perhaps the greatest idea.

...until recently, when SSE declared it'll raising prices by an inflation-busting 8.2%, after great profit, with other companies predicted to be right behind in offering similar rises. It would be a surprise, if they hadn't done the same bleedin' thing last year as well. And those same people, admonishing Eddy for his foolish socialist-imposed folly, have been lamenting the mean old energy companies for fucking over, well, everyone.

Mmm. Hypocrisy. Delicious.

Anyway, I don't want to make a bug fuss on this point, but I think Eddy may have a bit of a point on taking on the energy companies here. For starters, no matter what you say, it's not a free market. It's owed by a mere six companies in this country, and let's face it; I can't start a power station in my backyard as small start up business and compete. Nah. Not only that, tariffs are as confusing as possible and it's not exactly something the consumer can do without. It's sort of necessary today, unless you found a way to do without heat, hot food and internet. And the way most people find to achieve that is by dying cold, alone, hungry and horny.

And you thought there wasn't a way out!

It's the sort of market you can leave to it's own devices and watch as it becomes a mangled mess as the biggest boy dominate and set prices and to hell with the customer. Or you could regulate it, like most EU countries do, but, pfft! Fuckin' commies. I mean, France has energy prices regular, and EDF, who supplies power to both France and here, well, France's power rates are considerably cheaper... but that's probably because... <insert francophobic joke here.>

Of course, I might not of announced a big prices freeze pledge, but snuck up on energy companies like a ninja and blindsided them, but that's possibly because I've playing Mark of The Ninja way too much recently.

Black clothes? Check. Sword? Check. Kunai? Check. Lack of Madara? Double check.

It's a side scrolling stealth-em-up, (I think that's a thing?) where the play a ninja doing ninja stuff - sneaking in air vents, stabbing dudes, infiltrating skyscrapers, stabbing dudes, planning and executing distraction strategy, stabbing dudes, recovering scrolls, and once in a rare moment stringing a guy up by his neck as a lesson to every other dude in the area.

Before you stab them, of course.

Now Mark of the Ninja really appeals to the part of me who is, to be brutally honest, a complete asshole. It's a similar state I explored in the Batman Arkham games, where I'd be sniggering in a dark corner as the pelted the sole remaining guard in the room with Batarangs as you deliberately coaxed him around the room to discover, one after one, the beaten, broken, and strung up bodies of his friends. Like Arkham, Mark of The Ninja has a robust terror mechanic, where dead bodies found lying or strung up can provoke understandable fear responses, including the one time where I chucked a dead body at a patrolling dude for a laugh. Look, I either do this sort of thing here, in the safety of video games, or I go out and do this outside.

I jest.

It's too cold outside.

Just like Spider-Man, if that guy used chains and was about to use his dude's throat as a handy pocket.

Aesthetically, it's very pleasing style of cel-shaded cartoony looks, which makes it look very clear and crisp, with some beautiful smooth animations. The music does a brilliant job of setting the mood and keeping you entertained as you wait for a dude to hurry the hell up and wander over here so you can stab him. You'll observe the room in sight and sound, as your position dictates your line of sight, but out of it a small outlier of sound will appear letting you track dudes in need of a face stabbing. The story, while feeling a bit simplistic as a revenge tale, has the interesting hook that whilst you're better than the average ninja due to your bitchin' magical tattoos, said tattoos will eventually drive you more insane than the Daily Mail's reader comment section so previous champions tend to commit suicide to avoid gnawing off the faces of members of their own clan. Which is nice. That being said, simplistic does not mean bad - it provides more then adequate context to your actions and escalations.

My only complaint so far is that the checkpointing is kinda weird, and it sometimes knocks you back a room further than I'd like, meaning that the odd difficult room will result in you having to navigate a previous trap room for the millionth time and you'll die in the easier room a bunch of times as you get impatient and try to charge through it. Mostly the game gives you enough variety of routes and equipment that taking out a room makes you feel smart rather than being hand-held across.

And in the worst case scenario, if you botch it you can beat the tar out of dudes before sneaking back into the shadows grumbling about how it's bizarre the jump button is also the 'drop down' and 'open hatch' button. It's okay. We've all done it.

Now if they'd like to create some DLC where you hunt down the CEOs of a ruthless energy company - just spit balling here - there's plenty of people in this country that would buy it.





Mark of The Ninja is available in a multitude of places, including Steam and Xbox Live Arcade. Please check out there site, http://www.markoftheninja.com/ for more details.